Interesting articles, June 2020

In a 2015 speech to the Chicago Council on Foreign Affairs, George Friedman predicted that Russia would start disintegrating around 2020, if not before. It hasn’t happened and there are no signs it is about to. (Skip to the 48:12 mark in this video)
https://youtu.be/QeLu_yyz3tc?t=2892

Josef Stalin was a sadist and a thug, but he had a notoriously poor grasp of warfare and military affairs. This rang especially true for the navy, which he ordered to build several battleships that would have been massive but horrible.
https://www.navalgazing.net/Soviet-Battleships-Part-2

Here’s an awesome video of nuclear bombs blowing up warships. Even if a ship is still floating afterward, the force of the shockwave has probably caused a lot of damage thanks to walls caving in and machinery and pipes being physically broken.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUcmZbyLXB0

And here are even more awesome photos of Mad Max vehicles in Kurdistan.
https://thedeaddistrict.blogspot.com/2020/06/kurdish-mad-max.html

Russia has sent mercenaries to help the rebel faction in Libya, and now Egypt says it might send its own troops there to support them further. The government forces are backed by Turkey, which has also sent troops there, and a few other countries. Does everyone agree at this point that the U.S. made a mistake helping to oust Qaddafi?
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-libya-security-egypt/egypt-has-a-legitimate-right-to-intervene-in-libya-sisi-says-idUSKBN23R0W1

Ukraine’s army released a fascinating analysis of its war with Russia. The #1 killer of its tanks was Russian artillery, followed by shoulder-launched missiles. Tank-on-tank duels were rare events, and I suspect most of those were lopsided engagements where the loser was destroyed by one shot and didn’t even realize an enemy tank was in the area.
https://thedeaddistrict.blogspot.com/2020/03/analisys-of-combat-damage-of-ukrainian.html

U.S. commandos in Syria are using “smart sights” on their rifles. The sights are big and bulky–about the size of a soda can and with wires coming out of them–but they will inevitably shrink as the technology improves. Smart sights and guided bullets will someday let any soldier be a sniper.
https://www.thedrive.com/the-war-zone/33794/special-operators-in-syria-are-first-american-unit-to-use-computerized-sights-on-their-rifles

Chinese and Indian troops had a massive brawl along their disputed border in the Himalayas. Twenty Indians and an undisclosed number of Chinese died in the fighting, where knives and spiked clubs were used (they mutually agreed to ban guns from the area to reduce the odds of bloodshed).
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-53089037

China has finished building its own version of the GPS.
https://www.bbc.com/news/business-53132957

Space-X became the first, private company to launch humans into space. The two crewmen compared the ride favorable to the Space Shuttle, which both men flew on before its retirement.
https://www.foxnews.com/science/astronauts-falcon-9-rocket-was-totally-different-ride-from-the-space-shuttle

A private U.S. company has built an experimental stealth-y plane.
https://www.thedrive.com/the-war-zone/34003/scaled-composites-stealthy-demonstrator-jets-spotted-working-with-high-flying-proteus

A quad-copter “flying motorcycle” lost control and crashed during a demonstration in Dubai, nearly killing the pilot. It ain’t like it is in the Judge Dredd movie.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8409489/Shocking-moment-test-pilot-nearly-killed-hoverbikes-spinning-rotor-blades.html

Nineteen years after its debut, the Segway will halt production due to insufficient sales. The machine’s patents have also expired, so anyone can legally make copies. Segways didn’t radically alter ground transportation as its inventor hoped, but the rise of lightweight electric scooters shows there was merit to the idea. Segway just represented the wrong form factor.
https://www.npr.org/2020/06/23/882536320/after-nearly-two-bumpy-decades-the-original-segway-will-be-retired-in-july

Thermoelectric stoves convert heat into electricity. Imagine an electric Jeep with one such stove for a motor. Two robot workers would sit in the front seats. It would drive through areas where there was a high risk of forest fires. The robots would get out, chop up dead trees and dry wood lying on the ground, load it into the stove, and burn it to make electricity to charge their batteries and the Jeep’s. Once all the combustible material in the area was burned, they would drive to the next area and repeat.
https://solar.lowtechmagazine.com/2020/05/thermoelectric-stoves-ditch-the-solar-panels.html

Fish “migrate” from one isolated lake to another when birds eat fish eggs at one lake, and then excrete them in their feces at another lake. Some of the eggs can survive passage through a digestive tract.
https://phys.org/news/2020-06-fish-migrate-ingestion-birds.html

At last, a good explanation for why plants are green instead of black. The intensity level of the green wavelengths of light fluctuate the most on the Earth’s surface, and those variations would wreak havoc on a plant’s cells.
https://www.insidescience.org/news/plants-are-green-because-they-reject-harmful-colors

Human vision is pretty weak. We only see details and color in a narrow, forward-facing cone.
https://www.discovermagazine.com/mind/how-much-color-do-we-really-see

There’s growing evidence that transfusing blood from young people into old people improves the latter’s health. A new experiment suggests that an even simpler technique of removing half an old person’s blood and simultaneously replacing it with an equal volume of saline water and proteins might also be beneficial.
https://blogs.sciencemag.org/pipeline/archives/2020/06/12/young-blood-and-old-blood

A medical paper published last month in the Lancet claimed that the anti-malaria drug hydroxychloroquine actually increased the overall odds of dying among people who took it to treat COVID-19. People from many quarters quickly jumped on it as proof that President Trump’s advocacy of the drug was mistaken. However, the paper was recently retracted after nonpartisan scientists pointed out it didn’t include enough data supporting its conclusion.
https://www.npr.org/sections/coronavirus-live-updates/2020/06/04/870022834/authors-retract-hydroxychloroquine-study-citing-concern-over-data

But it’s not over…the FDA withdrew its endorsement of hydroxychloroquine as a treatment for COVID-19 because other, better studies showed it did nothing, but still induced the negative (but not lethal) side effects that have been known for decades. President Trump had previously claimed he was taking it prophylactically.
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-53054476

People with type A blood are the most vulnerable to COVID-19.
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/06/03/health/coronavirus-blood-type-genetics.html

We still don’t know if surviving COVID-19 gives a person permanent or temporary immunity to reinfection. Additionally, it’s possible that the first vaccine may only provide partial protection from the disease, and that its effect could wear off over time, requiring people to get booster shots. (There’s nothing surprising about this: the last flu vaccine was only 45% effective.)
https://blogs.sciencemag.org/pipeline/archives/2020/06/22/thoughts-on-antibody-persistence-and-the-pandemic
https://blogs.sciencemag.org/pipeline/archives/2020/06/15/what-might-go-wrong

Surprisingly, the George Floyd mass protests didn’t lead to spikes in COVID-19 infections. It seems very hard for the virus to spread among people who are outdoors, wearing surgical masks, and keeping a few feet of distance from each other. It is vastly more infectious in crowded, enclosed environments.
https://www.wired.com/story/what-minnesotas-protests-are-revealing-about-covid-19-spread/

The COVID-19 quarantines are actually unlikely to produce a baby boom. Instead, there will probably be 300,000 – 500,000 fewer U.S. births across 2020 and 2021, mostly due to potential parents having financial problems.
https://www.brookings.edu/research/half-a-million-fewer-children-the-coming-covid-baby-bust/

America’s leading public health expert has admitted what many have suspected: earlier this year, the government lied about the effectiveness of surgical masks in blocking the spread of COVID-19 because it didn’t want ordinary people to panic buy all of them, leading to shortages at hospitals.
https://www.thestreet.com/video/dr-fauci-masks-changing-directive-coronavirus

In the U.K., South Asians are the likeliest race of people to die of COVID-19 because they have the highest rates of diabetes and hence weakened immune systems. South Asians have a genetic predisposition to diabetes, made worse by the fact that their traditional diets are fatty.
https://www.bbc.com/news/health-53097676

The architect of Sweden’s hands-off response to the COVID-19 pandemic has admitted it was a mistake, and that more of his people died than would have had they adopted the same strict lockdowns as other European countries.
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-52903717

This model’s prediction of 110,000 COVID-19 deaths in the U.S. by June 6th was almost perfectly accurate. Today it says deaths will hit 147,000 by the end of July.
https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/05/13/855038708/combining-different-models-new-coronavirus-projection-shows-110-000-deaths-by-ju
https://viz.covid19forecasthub.org/

If you think things are bad in the world right now with the pandemic, social unrest, and all the other stuff, crack open a history book and realize how good we have it in the grand scheme of things. Be thankful you weren’t alive in Europe in 43 B.C., when the Roman Empire not only fell into civil war, but starvation became rampant because a volcanic eruption in Alaska dimmed the skies, killing farm crops around the world.
https://www.pnas.org/content/early/2020/06/17/2002722117

A convicted murderer has solved an ancient math problem in prison.
https://www.dw.com/en/murderer-solves-ancient-math-problem-and-finds-his-mission/a-53895884

“Internet sleuths” trying to track down an unknown man caught harassing people on video misidentified him and spread the wrong person’s contact information across the internet. Almost immediately, he got a surge of angry, threatening electronic messages.
https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2020/06/what-its-like-to-get-doxed-for-taking-a-bike-ride.html

Here’s an amazing and in-depth interview with AI researcher Joscha Bach.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-2P3MSZrBM

A new computer program can generate photorealistic illustrations of human faces based on crude sketches.
https://www.engadget.com/ai-can-produce-detailed-photos-of-faces-from-simple-sketches-122924655.html

Flat-panel TVs have come a long way from the fuzzy, motion-juddering, narrow-viewing-angle devices I remember from 15 years ago, and there’s room for them to improve farther.
https://youtu.be/RTTiQeXXrhI

The Tesla Model S now has an improved battery pack that gets 402 miles per full charge. That’s more than my gas-powered car.
https://www.tesla.com/blog/model-s-long-range-plus-building-first-400-mile-electric-vehicle

“The first piston steam engine, developed by Thomas Newcomen around 1710, was slightly over one half percent (0.5%) efficient.”
https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Engine_efficiency&oldid=958282962

The massive Ford car factory site at River Rogue, MI had a “car disassembly plant” from 1930-44. Hundreds of men worked there, systematically stripping parts off of Fords and other brands of cars, reusing or reselling what was still good, and melting down the rest to make metal for new Fords. I predicted this will return by the end of the 2030s thanks to cheap robots: “The same kinds of facilities will make inroads into the junk yard industry, as they would have all the right tooling to cheaply and rapidly disassemble old vehicles, test the parts for functionality, and shunt them to disposal or individual resale. (The days of hunting through junkyards by yourself for a car part you need will eventually end–it will all be on eBay. )”
https://link.gale.com/apps/doc/A80344909/AONE?u=googlescholar&sid=AONE&xid=b0a3b483

Q: “How Will You Get Robots to Pay Union Dues?”
A: “How Will You Get Robots to Buy Cars?”
These are funny quips, probably exchanged between Henry Ford and union leader Walter Reuther in the 1950s, but the insinuation that it will forever be impossible to cut humans out of the economic loop is mistaken. There’s no theoretical reason why there couldn’t someday be a factory run entirely by robots that made cars bought entirely by other robots.
https://quoteinvestigator.com/2011/11/16/robots-buy-cars/

What would a human-equivalent robot look like?

In my Terminator review and my analysis of what a fully-automated tank would look like, I mentioned that human-sized, general-purpose robots that can do the same physical tasks as humans will not necessarily look like humans, or even have humanoid body layouts (i.e. – head, large torso, two arms, two legs). I’d like to explore that idea in greater depth, and to offer educated guesses about what such robots would look like.

First, bear in mind that there are already countless numbers of robots in the world–overwhelmingly in factories and controlled work settings–and almost none of them are humanoid. Instead, their body shapes are entirely dictated by their narrow functions. For example, a robot that welds the seams between two sheets of metal comprising part of a car’s frame will resemble a giant arm and will have a welding torch for a hand. Since it is meant for use in a car factory assembly line where unfinished car frames will be delivered to it via conveyor belt, the robot won’t need to move from that spot, and hence won’t need legs or wheels. And since the act of welding a seam isn’t that complicated, it won’t need a giant computer brain, meaning it won’t have a head. Likewise, a robot designed to move supplies like medicine and linens throughout a hospital will take the form of a large, hollow box with wheels.

Even as robots get cheaper and more advanced in the coming decades and take over more jobs, the vast majority of them will continue looking nothing like humans, and will be designed for specific and not general tasks. Fully-autonomous vehicles, for example, will count as “robots,” but will not resemble humans.

That said, I think “overspecialization” of robot designs will prove inefficient, and that there will be niches for general-purpose robots in many areas of the economy and ordinary life. Some of these general-purpose robots will be about the same sizes as humans, but they won’t look exactly like us. Consider that the humanoid body layout is inherently unstable since it is top-heavy and only has two legs to balance on. If we had millions of bipedal, human-sized robots walking around and intermixing with us in many uncontrolled environments, there would be constant problems with them falling over (or being pushed over) and injuring or killing people. Something like a 250 pound Terminator made of hard metal would be a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Off the bat, it’s clear that general purpose robots can’t be so heavy that, if one fell on you, you would be seriously hurt, and/or unable to push it off of your body. At the same time, it can’t be so light that it tips over when carrying everyday objects like full trashcans, or is even at risk of being toppled by wind gusts. Splitting the difference between the average weights of adult men and woman gives us a figure of 180 lbs, which I think is a good upper limit to how much the robots could weigh.

Also off the bat, it’s clear that the general purpose robots should have the lowest practical centers of gravity and need to have soft exteriors to cushion humans against collisions. A low-hanging fruit helps us solve the first requirement: delete the robot’s head. This might sound very weird, but if we’re unbound by the constraints of biology and are designing a robot from metal and plastic starting from a clean slate, it makes perfect sense.

Since robots won’t eat, drink, or breathe, they won’t need mouths, noses, or any associated anatomical features found in human heads and necks. And since signals from the robot’s sensory organs would travel to its “brain” at the speed of light, there would be no advantage to clustering the eyes, ears, and brain together to reduce lag (thanks to the slowness of human nerve impulses, it takes about 1/10 of a second for an image or sound that has been detected by the eyes or ears to reach the brain), meaning the CPU could be moved into the torso. Doing that would lower the robot’s center of gravity and give the CPU more physical protection than our skulls provide our brains. (Distributing mental functions among several computer cores in different parts of the torso and even limbs would probably be an ideal setup since it would further improve survivability.)

In place of a neck and head, there might be a telescoping, flexible “stalk” or “tentacle” with sensory organs (camera lens, microphone) at its tip. It could extend and shorten, and swivel in any direction. By default, it would probably be facing forward and raised to the same height as a typical human head so it could see the world from the same perspective as we. The top of its torso might only be 4′ 10″ off the ground, but the stalk would rise up another foot. The sci fi space film Saturn 3 had an evil robot named “Hector” that had a crude tentacle like this in place of a head.

“Hector” the robot didn’t have a head. Note that the robots I envision would be much shorter than this.

The last safety requirement that I mentioned, the need to have soft exteriors to cushion humans against collisions, could be satisfied by making their outer casings from a spongy material like silicone. However, I think it would probably be cheaper and just as effective to give the robots hard outer casings, but have them wear tight-fitting, padded clothes. The general-purpose robots would know how to wash their clothes in standard laundry machines and would periodically do so. Also, if the padding were made of the plastic foam found in life jackets, it would keep the robots from sinking to the bottom if they, say, fell into a swimming pool while cleaning it, or fell off the side of a fishing boat where they were part of the crew.

The need to protect people from accidental injury will also mean that general purpose robots will be made no faster or stronger than average humans. These limitations would be very helpful to us in a “robot uprising” scenario, but they’d be just as beneficial preventing many kinds of small, mundane accidents that could hurt people. For example, if your robot isn’t stronger than you, it can’t accidentally crush your hand by applying too much pressure during a handshake. If it can’t move faster than a jog, it can’t ever build up enough speed and momentum to collide with you with fatal force.

The NS-5 robots could jump long distances and do acrobatics.

With these safety requirements in mind, it should be clear why the general-purpose “NS-5” robots in the movie I, Robot was unrealistic. There was no reason to give those robots superhuman speed, strength, agility, and explosive movement. Moreover, they all had hard exoskeletons and walked around “nude,” making them collision hazards. (On a side note, I also thought it was unrealistic that a single company–“U.S. Robotics”–would have an apparent monopoly on the humanoid robot market, and that all humans would own the same kind of robot. In reality, there will be many companies making them in the future, and there will be many different robot models and variants that will look different from one another, just as there’s great diversity in how cars look today.) 

Now that I’ve covered the safety issues general-purpose robots will have to be designed to address, let’s move on to exploring the other requirements that will affect how they will look. Since they’ll have to navigate human-built environments like houses and to fit into vehicles designed for us, they will need legs instead of wheels so they can climb steps, arms and hands for opening doors and using tools, and they will need to be skinny and short enough to fit through standard-sized doorways. The requirement for them to be able to sit in chairs and climb over obstacles like low fences and fallen tree trunks will mean the size proportions of their limbs and bodies won’t be able to stray too far from those of humans. They will need fingers that are as thin as ours to type on keyboards and push standard-sized buttons, but they might not have five fingers per hand (it will be interesting to see what the optimal number turns out to be).

It wouldn’t cost much more money to make the joints in the robots’ fingers and everywhere else double-jointed, and they’d gain useful dexterity from such a feature, so I think it would be so. Pivot joints in the arms and legs would also allow for 360 degrees of rotation, further bolstering utility. At first I thought the general purpose robots would have a second set of arms–for a total of six limbs–so they could be more able than humans, but then I realized how wasteful that would be since so few tasks require them. 99% of the time, the second set of arms would uselessly hang down off the robot’s body and be dead weight.

Then again, that 1% of the time when you do need the extra pair of hands to do something could warrant some kind of engineering compromise. The prehensile sensor stalks that stand-in for heads on our general-purpose robots could elongate and grasp onto things, acting like weak third hands (our mouths do the same, and can hold smell, light objects). Instead of, or in addition to that, the legs at the bottom of the robot could terminate in hands instead of feet like ours. Chimpanzees are like this, and many birds also have feet they use for grasping and walking. The setup would make it harder for the robots to run, and maybe less energy-efficient for them to walk, but we’ve already established we don’t want them to be able to run fast, and many of the tasks we’d use these robots for wouldn’t require large amounts of walking anyway (ex – robot butler in your house). Aside from giving them an extra pair of hands for those rare occasions when they need it, having hands as feet would let the robots pick things up from the ground, climb ladders more easily, and maintain better balance on uneven surfaces like roofs.

It almost goes without saying that the robots would be able to walk on all fours about as well as they could walk on two legs. If they weren’t carrying anything and were just going from one place to another, walking on all fours would be safest since that would minimize the risks of them losing balance and crushing someone or breaking something. This is again reminiscent of chimps, and I think the robots might use their “knuckles” when walking on all-fours to keep the palms of their hands clean and undamaged. And interestingly, in laying out this new requirement for optional quadrupedalism, the hypothetical general-purpose robot’s design has superficially converged with the real-life “Spot” robot, made by Boston Dynamics.

“Spot” is a real robot you can buy.

One thing I don’t like about Spot’s design is that its torso is a single, rigid piece. The general-purpose robots I’m envisioning–or at least the more advanced variants of it that will be fielded in the more distant future–will need segmented torsos that let them bend and lean a little in all directions. The flexibility of our spines lets us do this, helping us to quickly make small postural adjustments to balance on two feet. The robots might not need anything as elaborate as a human back made of 33 vertebrae, and, as with the number of fingers, it will be interesting to see what the optimal (or sufficient) number of torso segments turns out to be.

Having a flexible torso, four hands, and four, highly flexible limbs that could bend in more ways than we can would also let the general-purpose robots comfortably touch any part of their own bodies, enabling them to self-repair, which would be an invaluable feature. The swiveling sensor stalk plus tiny cameras built into other parts of its body like the hands and torso would also let it see every part of its own body (cameras built into the hands or fingers would also let it reach inside small, tight spaces and clearly see what is inside, letting it guide the appendage, unlike humans who must blindly feel around in such situations). Contrast this with us humans, who have a hard time touching and manipulating some parts of our bodies (like the spot between our shoulderblades) and who can’t see every part of our own bodies because we have only one set of eyes that are in a head with limited rotation.

On that note, having small cameras embedded throughout its body would also eliminate blind spots, which would improve safety since the robots wouldn’t be at risk of running into humans or objects because they were unseen. Whereas human vision is confined to a forward-facing cone, the general purpose robots would see in a 360-degree bubble. The tip of the head stalk might have the biggest and best camera, but losing it wouldn’t blind the robot.

Having “eyes” in the torso and on all four limbs, along with a distribution of its mind and power sources among multiple internal computers and batteries in each place, could enable such a robot to fix itself even if only one limb were operational and everything else were not. Again, this reminds me a bit of something I’ve seen in the animal kingdom, this time among certain insects and spiders. Because they have less-centralized nervous systems than we, their limbs will keep moving after being severed, and, if they are cut in half across the torso, both halves will continue moving and reacting to stimuli.

Additionally, while the robots wouldn’t need to breathe, they should have an ability to suck in, retain, and expel air. This would allow them to duplicate the human abilities to blow out candles or blow dust off of things, and to make our bodies buoyant for floating in water. Of course, the engineering solutions that will let them do this could be totally different from human anatomy’s solutions. A small hole at the tip of one finger could be used to suck in and expel air, and it could be connected to a long tube that would lead to air sacs throughout the robot’s body, perhaps in places not analogous to where lungs are in our bodies.

The robots would also need to be waterproof. This would save them from being expensively damaged or destroyed by something as simple as rain, and would let them periodically clean themselves off with soap and water. Even without sweat glands and shedding skin cells, robots would inevitably get dirty thanks to dust in the air, splatter from kitchen or bathroom chores, or even mold growth. Being able to use a regular shower or a bucket of water and a sponge to clean themselves would be a very important feature, in addition to their ability to clean their clothes.

Another crucial feature would be a built-in power cord that could plug into standard electrical outlets. It might be stored internally in a small, closed compartment, or might take the form of retractable prongs located in one of the hands or feet. I suspect that, rather than get in your way, general-purpose robots will be programmed to run around your house and do chores when you were away at work or school. That would also be safer since it would eliminate any risk of the robots hurting you by accident while they were working. You would come home each day to a clean house and see your robot motionless in its designated corner or closet, plugged into an electrical outlet to recharge.

Machines like this can detect a wide range of poisonous chemicals.

I’ve already mentioned the robots would need to have cameras and microphones to duplicate the human senses of sight and hearing, but they would also need to duplicate our sense of smell and taste to a degree. Those two senses can provide valuable information about the presence of poisonous gases, smoke, or spoiled food ingredients, and there are situations where a robot would be grossly ill-equipped to respond properly if it lacked them. Our multipurpose robots would thus need air sampling devices and some type of fluid analysis capability. The same technology found in smoke detectors, carbon monoxide detectors, and military poison gas detectors could stand in for a sense of smell. To crudely duplicate our sense of taste, the robot might have something like a litmus strip dispenser and water nozzle built into one of its hands. It could spray water on objects and then touch them with a strip to “taste” them.

The fifth human sense, touch, would need to be duplicated by pressure and temperature sensors distributed throughout the general purpose robot’s body. This feature would be simple to implement.

In conclusion, I predict there will be a future niche for “human-equivalent” robots that are general-purpose, human-sized, and can do all of the physical work tasks that we can do. That said, those robots will look very different from us, as they won’t be bound by the rules of biology or by the genetic path dependence that locks us into our human body layout. I’ve gone into depth describing one type of general-purpose robot, which could be described as a “headless humanoid.” However, I think robots with other types of body layouts could also fill the niche, perhaps including “centaurs”, “big ants”, and “dogs with one arm on their backs.” Just as there are many types of vehicles on the roads today that fulfill the same roles, I am sure there will be many types of general-purpose robots. I simply don’t have the time to envision and describe what each one could be like.

General-purpose, human-sized robots will of course not be the only kinds of robots we’ll mix with on a daily basis in the future, and in fact, I think they will be outnumbered by other, specific-purpose robots whose forms reflect their specialized functions. Self-driving cars and autonomous lawnmowers are good examples.

Finally, the general-purpose, human-sized robots must not be confused with androids, which will look identical to humans. I think the general-purpose robots will be used for jobs that don’t require anything more than superficial interaction with humans, like scrubbing toilets, restocking store shelves, and fixing appliances. Androids would be built to provide companionship, and to do service-sector jobs where warm and personable service was expected. If your beautiful android spouse broke, then your grubby, headless, weird-looking robot servant would fix it.